Why Not?

I am a maximizer. If I hear a song I like on the radio, I first have to check the other presets to see if there is a song I like better before I am satisfied to listen to the original song. If I find something I want to buy, I have to check every store in town to find the best price and best version of the item. I spend lots of time and effort making the most banal decisions, and even after I've made them, I fret about whether I made the best choice.

It's different than being a perfectionist in that a perfectionist looks back with satisfaction and says, "Yeah. I did good," whereas a maximizer looks back with regret and wonders whether they really did the best they could. For me, I feel that there is always one "right" decision and everything else is the the wrong choice, and I will not rest until I've found that right answer.

For the small decisions, being a maximizer is not that big of a deal. I realize that if I don't make a decision, I will soon reach the point of diminishing returns, i.e. I will miss the song on the radio, I will spend more money driving around finding the perfect item than I would have saved in the end, etc. However, when it comes to the big decisions - where to invest my money, where to live, buying a car, etc., being a maximizer is torture as often there is no "right" answer.

The past few months I've been wallowing in indecision about jobs, school, Peace Corps, where to live, and various combinations of all four. The compulsion to make the "right" decision has paralyzed me from making any decisions at all. Then, this weekend, advice came at the most unexpected times.

First, Todd and I were chatting about Peace Corps and he said, "I figure, why not? Why wouldn't I do it? What possible reason do I have not to?" BAM.

The next day, I received information about a scholarship opportunity in a field I am sort of interested in. I was waffling and shifting about the pros and cons of applying when Andy said, "Why don't you just apply for it and see what happens. Why not?" BAM.

Their words have pervaded my thoughts the past few days. The more I think about it, the more it makes sense. There's no "right" decision, so why drive myself crazy trying to find it? Why not take a risk? Why not just start trying stuff and see where it leads? Why not take advice from 23-year-old boys?

Why not?