Day Three: The Day At Sea

Today, we were at sea all day.  The air is suddenly warm and salty and the waves much bigger.  We spent several hours passing by Haiti - mountainous, jagged, and dry. It was absolutely beautiful.  There were fishermen out on their roughly-fashioned sailboats and we spied upon them with our binoculars. 

After passing Haiti, there was nothing but open ocean as far as the eye could see.  In fact, I spent a good deal of today contemplating how terrifying it would be to be lost at sea.  It’s just vast and overwhelming and rough and I’m weak and pale and without an ounce of practical survival knowledge, despite reading many books during my childhood about surviving misadventures and not blinking once during the entirety of Castaway.  Coincidentally, I’ve been reading A Short History of Nearly Everything where the author briefly outlines the history of major scientific discovery. I’ve been thinking a lot about how man has dominated the earth, subdued its wildness, and is now plundering its resources, while the ocean seems untamed and undiscovered and able to vengefully crush man.

I also made several food mistakes today. These mistakes were born out of my determination to
a) get my money’s worth out of this cruise by eating expensive food;
b) try new things to which I wouldn’t normally have access; and
c) feel like a classy adult who enjoys fancy food.

My first food mistake was ordering duck paté.  I guess I thought I was ordering something more like duck pat-ty. Only after ordering did my mother lean over and say, “You know paté is liver, right?” As a general rule, I find it best to avoid animal parts that function to eliminate waste from the body, but I decided to roll with it.  Much to my chagrin, it was significantly less delicious than spam.  As though tasting bologna-fied duck liver wasn’t bad enough, it had this disgusting layer of slightly yellowed gelatin on top.

Duck Paté Verdict: Though beautiful in presentation, not beautiful in taste.  Also, what’s with the Jello Jigglers on top?

My second food mistake was ordering lobster. Everyone was raving about how delicious lobster is, so though I generally do not like shelled sea creatures, I came to dinner prepared to love it, or at the very least develop a working relationship with the stuff.  As it turns out, I still do not love lobster.  In fact, it grossed me out - the texture, the taste, the smell.  The texture. My jaws are clenching just thinking about it.  Worse, its legs were sticking in my broccoli. Still worse, the fact that legs were easily identifiable.

Lobster Verdict: Woof. I don't get the appeal.

The highlight of the day, by far, was karaoke*.  My favorite performer was a stout German man named Roland who had a face like melting wax.  He apparently loved Elvis as well as the ladies, and insisted on pointing at women in the audience while he sang.  At several points, he spun around and unabashedly shook his posterior at the audience, eliciting hoots and hollers from the whole of the white-headed audience. 

The other standout was a tiny, lithe woman with a deep, gravelly voice and a long white braid named Madeline.  She was singing the Righteous Brothers Unchained Melody and at one point said, “Check this out,” as she squatted down – to the ground – and slowly rose up as she sang a mega-long note. I had tears streaming down my face it was so hilarious.

Today confirmed that I am a girl of simple tastes. I prefer sandwiches (aka, the world's most perfect food) to lobster or snobby duck guts, and a good bout of kareoke will easily entertain me for an evening.

*Becca and Bailey Bolten, you would have loved this. How I wish you were here!